


Finding Love (In Both Your Arms)

by flipflop_diva



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Feels, Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie) Spoilers, Getting Together, Multi, Natasha Feels, POV Natasha Romanov
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-16
Updated: 2016-01-16
Packaged: 2018-05-13 16:45:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5709676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flipflop_diva/pseuds/flipflop_diva
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What she had with Clint was one thing. What he had with Laura was another. What they all had together was something that couldn't be explained.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Finding Love (In Both Your Arms)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [fanfic_nonnie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fanfic_nonnie/gifts).



> Happy Holly Poly, fanfic_nonnie! I hope you enjoy!

She noticed it long before she said anything. His kisses were different, slower, more cautious. He still pressed his fingers to her skin, took his time with her at night, but it was more tentative, like he wasn’t sure it was what he really wanted anymore.

She was pretty sure it was her, because after all, this was still new to her, and she didn’t know any more how to be in an actual relationship than she did how to truly trust someone and let them in, but the one thing she did know how to do, almost better than anything, was to read people, and she could tell instantly that there was something he wasn’t telling her.

But she kept it to herself. Partly to see if he would tell her but partly because as much as she told herself she didn’t care if what they had ended, deep inside she did care that he was her partner, and she didn’t know what would happen to her if he didn’t want to work with her anymore. She’d work with plenty of partners before, but if she was honest with herself, Clint was the first one she trusted not to kill her.

The missions, though, didn’t seem different. They were a flawless pair every time, taking down drug lords in South America and recovering stolen files in Taiwan, but sometimes she caught him looking at her, studying her almost, and she felt more vulnerable than when she was naked in front of him, his face buried between her legs.

On the night they barely escaped being gunned down by a former KGB agent who she thought recognized her, and then were almost trapped in a warehouse fire, she finally said something. They were sitting side-by-side on the Quinjet back to SHIELD, but he wasn’t touching her. He wasn’t even looking at her. Just staring off into the darkness out the window, his fingers subconsciously tapping on his leg.

She placed her hand over his. “Tell me,” she whispered.

He turned to look at her. “What?” he said, but she knew he knew what she meant. There was no question in his eyes, only sadness.

“It’s okay,” she said. “I’m not the type of girl anyone settles down with.”

“Tasha …”

“What’s her name?” she asked, before he could say more. She didn’t need him to tell her she was wrong, or that she deserved something better, because she wasn’t and she didn’t, and that was just how things were.

“Laura.”

“She sounds nice.”

He smirked, but the amusement didn’t reach his eyes. “You can tell that by her name?”

“I am very smart.” She grinned back at him, most of it fake but some of it real, trying to ignore the weird sensation in the pit of her stomach and focusing instead on his eyes and the way they almost lit up when he said Laura’s name.

“She is nice,” he said.

“You deserve someone who is good to you. I want you to be happy.”

“Tasha.” He frowned. “This doesn’t change things between us.”

“Of course it does.” Now it was her turn to frown.

“No, it doesn’t,” he said again. “I told her about you.”

•••

She was nothing Natasha expected her to be but yet she was everything Natasha expected her to be. Smart, kind, compassionate, loving. And the way she looked at Natasha, from the moment they were introduced, like she thought Natasha was actually worthy of being loved, of being _someone_.

It made Natasha feel awkward. Exposed. Like a piece of a puzzle that just didn’t belong, even if she thought she might actually want to.

“You don’t have to do this,” Natasha said to her later that evening, when they had both excused themselves to use the ladies’ room. She had seen the way Clint and Laura looked at each other. Natasha didn’t believe in love, but they almost made her want to.

It hurt in a way she didn’t completely understand to think of letting go of Clint, but Laura was perfect.

“I know I don’t have to,” Laura said. She looked at Natasha then, really looked at her, as if she could see all of her, could see deep into her soul. “I want to.”

“But,” Natasha frowned. “Won’t it be weird?”

“Dating two assassins?” Laura shrugged. “Not too much weirder than dating one.”

•••

It was hard to concentrate. Her legs were weak, and standing made the world around her spin in ways that made her want to throw up. Clint’s arm around her, though, was an anchor, guiding her like always. 

She wasn’t so out of it, though, that she didn’t notice the looks on her teammates’ faces when Clint introduced them to Laura, and to the kids, who came running. She also wasn’t so out of it that she didn’t miss the way her teammates were looking at _her_ , like they had just uncovered some scandalous secret.

“But I thought …,” she heard Tony mutter behind her as she stepped forward to hug Cooper and Lila.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Steve looking almost horrified and Tony still looking confused, and she wanted to explain, but everything still felt off, and she felt off, and then Lila and Cooper were sliding out of her arms and someone else was sliding in, and she felt Laura’s arms tighten around her, pulling her in, and then Laura’s lips were brushing her forehead.

“Hi, love,” she whispered.

Behind them, she heard Tony actually gasp.

“Well, damn,” he said. “You two really _can_ keep secrets.”

••• 

She crawled into bed in her normal spot, on Clint’s left side, Laura already curled into his right, her belly getting slightly in the way of their closeness. She reached out a hand to touch Laura’s stomach, waited for her little namesake to kick at her hand. 

“I’m so glad you’re both here,” Laura whispered softly.

“Nat had a hard day today,” Clint said. He lifted an arm to tuck it around Natasha, to pull her in closer. She closed her eyes against him, felt Laura reach over and rub her arm.

“I’m okay now,” she told them. “I’m with you.”

“Go to sleep, Nat,” Laura said. “We’ve got you now.”

They did. She knew that. They had each other. The way it should be. 

She closed her eyes. And slept.


End file.
